Question of the Day?

This one has me scratching my head.  You all know me and know my outgoing, bubbly personality, right?  I love everybody (most of the time anyway) :-).

So, here's a question for people with my personality.  You work with folks male and female, get along with them, and have professional respect for them, etc. and it's lunch time.  You say, "Hey, you wanna go to Subway or Panda Express?"  There's absolutely nothing behind it except "You wanna get
lunch?"

Okay, so I asked a guy that I work with the question.  We've been working together for some time now.  His response to me.  "Shouldn't I be the one asking?"

I look at him like he has two heads because I didn't know what he was talking about and then realize that he thinks I'm hitting on him.  My alter ego, Shaquita, wanted to respond, "Not if you were the last piece of male specimen on this side of the River Jordan." 

What's worse is that I couldn't suppress the obnoxiou,s guttural laugh that flew out of my mouth.  And if you know me, you all know that I can bellow.  I looked into his hurt eyes and told him that it wasn't that kinda of "lunch question."

Questions for my girls? 
Why do people assume that you have some hidden, romantic agenda?  How romantic can you get over a Kung Pao Chicken, or a sloppy Subway sandwich that you bite into and mayonnaise drips onto the corner of your lips.

Or, does the person you're talking to believe the lie his mother told him when she said, "Baby, you're as fine as Denzel, Tyrese, Brad Pitt, or George Clooney."   So they assume you're after their flabby or non-descript bodies.

I'd like to hear your inputs.

Comments

[Caroline]

Devi,

If the guy isn't assuming then it's always the gossiping co-workers.

[Caroline]

Charlie,

You are toooooo funny!

Thx for the post.

[Charlie]

A few years ago, Safeway directed all employees to look customers directly in the eye when speaking to them, and give them a smile. Most female employees found that at least a few male customers took it as a romantic invitation. I think Safeway dropped that policy. I can think of one time that I sort of wondered whether a friend who is a woman, whom I had known for a couple of years, MIGHT have a more personal interest... she didn't. We're still on friendly terms, thank God. I really can't think of a less romantic place for lunch than Subway; maybe if you'd invited him to Chick-Fil-A, or better someplace Italian, a little hopeful speculation would have been justified. No, I can't account for how men respond to women. I don't quite know what you see in us in the first place.

[Devi]

Wandered over from AW.

I have a male friend who I've worked with at two different companies over a period of five years. Completely platonic friendship. We often go to lunch together. I never thought much of it until another coworker started making jokes that we were having an affair. Ridiculous.

[KGil]

Hey Caroline,

I can't stop lol, this is good maybe we can do a question of the day every Friday, but you seem to have me laughing all the time, well my thoughts are that he was probably liking you and when you asked him to go to lunch, and not asking him out to, he might have taken it the wrong way, then you laughed at him, OMG Caroline you might have crushed his pride, but as long as you explained to him the difference of what you were asking, hopefully he got the picture, and if not, he might want to take it easy, slow his pace, think twice, at least one of those suggestions. Hey, question, did you have gum in your mouth, because I can remember a Caroline Wilson on WDW Friday night talking with gum in her mouth but holding on to it like it was her last piece, lol and he might have misheard you thinking you asked him out for a lunch date, lol

[Lady Style]

Caroline girl:

You have me in stiches!!! I can identify with you sister girl. I really don't know how to be deep and spiritual with this one so you don't have to worry about that with me.

Don't freak out but do you think the brother has had something for you and that he was just waiting for the opportunity? Just wondering.........

Forgive me if I step on any toes here but I find a lot of our brothers to be paranoid and suffer from a total lack of self esteem. As much as I try not to use this word, they are indeed "intimidated" by a woman who can hold her own. You are a very independent and confident woman; why wouldn't he try to diminish you?

Our guys are so messed up; so misguided. They think that every woman who even greets them is coming on to them; although, I might add, some of our sisters create this monster and unfortunately, these guys can't distinguish a genuine, decent woman with nothing but good intentions from those sisters who crawl all over them. Girl, I was at the gym one day and saw this older man who looked great so I, mean physically fit - muscular for his age). We were working out on machines next to each other and me, like you, being my bubbly and friendly self told him that he was doing a great job keeping his body in shape (I tell say the same to women). The next thing I know, the man was getting fresh with me; asking for my number etc. etc. Girl, I was horrified. I told a girlfriend of mine the story and she asked me what did I expect - that I told the man he looked good. I was in total shock to hear this coming from another woman. So you see what I am talking about when I say that other sisters create monsters???

Sister Linda, I read your response and I totally agree with you that most people crave affirmation; most are confused and feel the need for validation. I have met brothers who have a problem with my independence and my strength (which only comed from the Lord). I have been told that I should act a little needy but unfortunately, I don't know how to do that, "thank you dear daddy"!!!!!

Ladies, I could go on and on but I will stop here for now. Caroline girl, thanks for the laugh and I do hope that the discussion continues. It is good therapy. :-)

[Angel Voice]

hilarious!!!... okay.. i've learned about 'love languages' from a book by gary chapman, and i discovered that of the 5 love languages (words, touch, actions, gifts, & quality time), i operate primarily through (and desire) words and touch... now, through my personal observations, it appears that most men are stimulated by what they see, but i also think it must be connected to their hearing, because all you have to say is 'hello' to a man, and he thinks you're proposing marriage!... and God forbid you give the man a compliment...then he thinks he has guaranteed panties!... unfortunately, there is absolutely nothing you can do about this... the most you can do is pray for God to give you the right words to say and type when talking with a man... but just to get a bite to eat???... girl, what can i say... bring your lunch and eat alone... lol...

[AEP]

Oh that's funny! Is he even a 1/2 bag of chips?